Welcome to Part 4 of 4 of Kristin's Journal Entries...

03-30-05...

Dana asked me why I didn’t want to come to my session today. 

I told her because if I put something out of my mind, I just don’t have to think about it.  If I didn’t go see her today, I wouldn’t have had to deal with these problems and how I was feeling.  She asked if I hold feeling/emotions in or if I let them out.  I told her that I let them out – I cry.  Sometimes I don’t want to cry – I just want to be that strong person that can overcome this “problem”. 

I hate feeling so out of control. 

Like something else has control over my actions and how I feel.  When am I going to feel like myself again?  When am I going to be “back to normal”?  I told her 9 times out of 10 I do let my feelings out.  I was crying this whole session.  She said that she could tell when I had walked in that something wasn’t right.  That I wasn’t feeling 100%. 

She asked if I felt hopeless and I told her yes.  Why?  Because I’ve been “here” before.  It’s like a constant circle that I’m stuck in: I eat well and get really serious about something and then after 1 month or so, I slowly regress to my old ways, which leads right back to bingeing.  AUGH.

How come I just can’t end this cycle?  What’s the point in even trying to lose weight and getting over this emotional eating?  I don’t see results – I actually feel fatter than ever.  So instead of being extra motivated to do better, I just sit at home and do nothing. 

I snuck food this week too.  We bought some jalapeno cheese dip at the grocery store.  I ate the whole thing in just 1 sitting, in my office with the door shut.  I didn’t want Rob to know that is what I was doing.

Every time it sounded like he was coming, I would hide the dip.  God forbid he saw the real me...

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While going through all of my journals that I have written in over the last several years, I broke down.  I'm just so happy to see how far I've come since the beginning.  Or for that matter, how far I've come to overcome my Binge Eating Disorder.  There's nothing more that I want than to help people like you.

I've been right where you are.  I know how you feel.  I know that it feels like there's no way out and that you are stuck at times.  You can beat this.  I know you can.

As I mention on the home page of my website, everyone that purchases my eBook will get my direct contact information.  I'm here to help you any way that I can to overcome your Binge Eating Disorder and become the person who you've always wanted to be.

Yes, it can and will be done.  I believe in you.

To a new you!

P.S... Have you ordered your copy of my eBook yet?  If not, please go to: http://www.endbingeeating.com.  For a limited time, I'm also including a bonus book that I wrote listing all of my favorite quotes that I read very often.  This alone was a big help for me to finally put an end to my binge eating disorder. 

P.P.S... Although this concludes the free bonus for joining my newsletter... this is only the beginning.  I'll be sharing news, ideas, stories, and so much more with you every week.  I truly hope that you'll find my newsletter fun, interesting, and helpful every week!